I'm trying to figure out what the most appropriate state of mind is for this evening. My sorrow is empathetic mostly. Yes I'm sad for the loss of life, but also I grieve for my friend who is hurting and for Tyler's family that is hurting, broken hearted.
I felt like I needed to write something down, but I'm not even sure what I have to say. I know I want so much better for Faith, then this heart ache. If anyone is reading this and you're talking to Faith, (Or Tyler's family, though I don't know them) please please please don't try to make her feel better. That may sound like an odd request, but really what I'm saying is people are entitled to their grief. Sadness makes us uncomfortable so we try to make people feel better, so that we don't get bogged down by their sadness. Faith needs lots of hugs, and loves and support. She needs people who don't need her to keep it all together. Let her fall apart and mourn and be broken hearted. We can't erase the ache that she feels, but we can love her through it.
Faith knows I run off at the mouth occasionally, so hopefully she won't mind that I wrote something and included her in it. She's just heavy on my heart right now. I want to go to her, but I don't want her to be overwhelmed with people, plus she's got tons of support right now. And I want to make sure she feels loved for the duration. It's sad now, with a dose of shock, but in the upcoming months, Faith is going to feel his absence more and more. That's when we need to pour out the love. So I guess in essence I'm trying to convey emotions, before my actions. What my heart, is for one of my friends that I've known almost half my life time.
I'm not sure why this was so important to me to say, but I had to get it out.
